The toilet clause

Those who know me well (and to be fair, probably also those who don’t as well) know that I have a pretty small tank on board, so need to make frequent trips to the loo.

And up until starting the challenge to avoid the supermarkets, the public toilets in stores like Tesco and Morrisons were my saving grace.

As a roving reporter in Scotland a few years ago I was often out on the road for most of the day and relied totally on my supermarket stop-offs to prevent me from spoiling my car upholstery.

Now I’m mainly office-based, but yesterday I spent the afternoon out and about in Derbyshire visiting farms for Friday’s food you can trust feature. And sure enough, a couple of hours into my trip, after enjoying a nice fresh orange juice at Hackwood Farm cafe, near Derby, I started to need the loo.

Unfortunately, the time this need became more pressing coincided exactly with the moment I realised that I had got myself lost while on my way to Woodside Farm and nature reserve, near Shipley.

What followed what a tense time in the Astra, as I clutched the steering wheel and shifted in my seat, swearing colourfully at every red traffic light or slow driver.

Would I make it to the farm in time? And once there, would there be a loo? Or would I have to suffer the ultimate indignity of finding myself a secluded patch of shrubs?

So when I reached Heanor and the familiar blue Tesco sign loomed into view I’d never been more grateful. It was time to invoke the toilet clause of this challenge.

I skidded into the car park, parked diagonally across one of those family spaces and shot into the store, veering sharply past a security guard and into the cafe where the toilets were situated.

Perhaps I’m not quite ready to give up supermarkets completely. I have a feeling I’ll always be able to make use of their loos.